Novelty & Toy Reviews

Couture Collection Inspire
California Exotic Novelties
Price: Approximately $50 – $122

Sex toys are like lovers. I try not to compare them to one another, but there are times when associations are impossible to ignore. Anything shaped like a Hitachi Magic Wand, for instance, will instantly be compared to, well, a Hitachi Magic Wand.

Since the Magic Wand has long been a platinum standard pleasure device — made even better by its absolute and honest plausible deniability – that kind of comparison is serious business. Literally, for the ever-increasing number of companies dedicated to creating the ultimate erotic wand-massager-on-girl experience.

When California Exotic sent me its Couture Collection Inspire, I was skeptical, but open to the possibilities. I recently raved about the mid-size, rechargeable BodyWand, which meant that the Inspire would be compared to not merely the now-dethroned Magic Wand, but the usurping BodyWand.

Inspire is much more like the mid-size BodyWand as far as size and being rechargeable. It does not come with a felt draw string storage bag, but its packaging can be reused if you have the space.

The Inspire has a sleek shape and a Velvet-cote plastic finish on the handle that took me a little bit of time to get used to holding. While the Velvet-code never ceases to fascinate me, I always find that its nearly frictionless surface distracts the living hell out of me both because it feels so… frictionless… and because learning how to keep my grip takes practice. When used by a friend, the Inspire is much easier to control.

A 100/20 V power adaptor plugs into the bottom of the wand handle and a glowing red light provides A single and easy-to-press-and-hold button activates the Inspire and controls what I was amazed to discover to be a mind-blowing range of vibration. To be honest, I’m not sure I’ve reached the Inspire’s maximum speed; eventually it starts moving so fast that I worry it might split time and space asunder.

Which is not a complaint.

The possibility that it might ignite parts of my body that I’d prefer to keep at roughly room temperature, however, does make this a personal massager that needs to be watched. Safety instructions stored inside the packaging aren’t sure how long the Inspire can be used before hot sexy time becomes emergency room friction burns time, but suggests a vague five to 20 minutes. Perhaps its ultimate value is that of a finishing toy?

Although this is a phthalates free silicone massager, it is absolutely not a waterproof item on any imaginable level. This is interesting, given that the packaging prominently features moving water. It is also not a device to use if being overheard is a concern. While it doesn’t rattle or anything ghastly like that, the volume of the hum is impressive. Of course, given how fast the Inspire can move, this isn’t a real surprise.

Unquestionably a massager worth serious consideration for those who like the wand style but want a far more intense experience than has traditionally been available.

I still favor the mid-size BodyWand, but the Inspire is a comparable-to-less-expensive alternative, depending upon vendor, and it absolutely goes to 11… and beyond.

-– Exclusive review for, by Darklady -–

Price: Mini BodyWand Massager: $19.95
Price: Mid-sized BodyWand Massager: $129.99
Price: Original BodyWand Massager: $99.99

Breaking up is hard to do, but sometimes it’s just time to say goodbye. Sometimes personal needs and interests change. Sometimes energy levels don’t match up anymore. Sometimes bed death happens – and sometimes you just find something better; something able to make big promises and live up to them.

I have found such a “something” in the BodyWand, which means that I am committing the sex-positive sin of bidding a fond farewell to my Hitachi Magic Wand and its Adam & Eve knock-off. I will always cherish the time that we had together, but now they will relate to me as highly effective back and shoulder massagers, not lovers.

In their place (meaning, within arm’s reach of the bed) will be a younger generation of “wand” style massagers; a generation fully capable of going where their predecessors told me they could reach, but rarely managed.

When I say “BodyWand,” of course, I refer to three different items currently within that product line. Like the Three Bears, these three items come (heh) in three different sizes: mini (battery-powered), mid-sized (rechargeable), and large (original AC powered). Each is packaged in tasteful and comfortably utilitarian boxes with plastic molded inserts and a tab for optional hanging as part of a retail display.

All three sizes are variations on the same concept, but each provides its own unique sensation, due to size and available power. In addition to the very real benefits each can provide to G- and P-rated aching body parts, each can also provide very real benefits to X-rated aching body parts.

Let us begin with the mini-BodyWand:
At a petite 4-inches from the bottom of its pretty-in-pink “conveniently located” vibration control dial to the top of its flexible-necked, white-domed top, this clutch-purse/pocket sized massager packs an impressive buzz.

Box text claims otherwise, but it’s not a particularly quiet buzz, so it’s probably best to avoid use in public places or domestic environments with attentive ears. Its “simple one finger control” requires more than one finger in order to use, but considering its size – and yes, how comely it looks – it’s a stylish and effective way to relieve stress, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

A flexible neck makes it a contortionist of sorts, a splashproof nature presumably reassures squirters, six LR44 watch batteries make it annoying as hell to juice up, and two rings of deep pink and clear rhinestones at the base add a feminine sense of style. The fact that a set of the aforementioned watch batteries are included makes it easy to forgive them for being annoying to stack inside a tube. All-in-all, this is a convenient, effective, attractive, and affordable travel massager… with a one-year warranty!

The mid-sized BodyWand:
This may be a “mid-sized” wand massager, but it can conjure up a full-sized orgasm while still being small enough to fit into the average purse.

The basic look of the mid-sized BodyWand is essentially the same as the mini-BodyWand, except bigger and with a couple of very important differences. Instead of batteries, the mid-sized BodyWand comes with an electric recharger – and that “simple one finger control” promoted on the boxes of all three sized BodyWands.

Available in white with lavender or something called “pastel tea green” highlights, this cordless wand has a flexible neck, an easy grip, and a wheel control dial that makes it nearly effortless to adjust vibrations up or down the spectrum. And this is where it and its bigger version totally put the Magic Wand to shame.

Instead of a switch with two speeds, the BodyWand’s wheel is not only much easier to use but the massager itself has much more power. Where the Magic Wand left me frustrated with the fact it doesn’t go one notch higher, the BodyWand has speeds I still haven’t unexplored… because I didn’t need to go there.

Like the Hitachi style wand, the flexible heads of all three BodyWands are perfect for attachments, although they may not be available in all three sizes just yet. Like its smaller and larger siblings, it comes with a one-year warranty. Unlike either of its siblings, it also comes with a soft – if kinda cheap feeling – fabric storage pouch. The box text claims it’s “velvet,” but it’s not.

After charging the wand’s lithium ion battery, it will hold about twice that amount of time in vibration. In other words, charge for a half hour and play for an hour. A small light let’s you know when it’s ready to go.

Alas for me, I have misplaced the recharger and, for the first time in my life, am feeling quite pouty about not being able to spend more quality time with my favorite toy.

The Original-sized BodyWand:
Not knowing anything about the ancestry of the BodyWand, I’m not sure why the largest one is called the “Original.” It is, however, sized more like the Hitachi, only sleeker and with the same wonderful speed wheel as its middle sibling. Like its inspiration, it requires a standard A/C power source.

Other than the fact it’s available in a white/soft robin’s egg blue and uses an electrical outlet for its juice, the Original BodyWand is much like the mid-sized version. Both are surprisingly quiet, given what they are, come with a one-year warranty, and have flexible necks that make them more body adaptable.

The larger size may give it more plausible deniability, but I’m not sure what cave or century one would have to live in to not suspect that it isn’t as innocent as it pretends to be.

-– Exclusive review for, by Darklady -–

Solar Bullet
California Exotic Novelties
Available at

With “green technology” finally getting the attention it has long deserved, it’s comforting to know that the California Exotic Solar Bullet exists.

Although probably manufactured in the traditional manner, this light-weight bullet vibe comes packaged in a pleasantly earth-tone, recyclable paper box. Adding to the credibility of its “eco-friendly” claim is the fact that this quiet but impressively strong bullet vibe doesn’t need a battery, because it’s solar powered.

What this means for Gaia-loving masturbators is guilt-free play not merely within the safety of their own homes, but anywhere!

Sure, you can haul a sack of batteries into the woods or along a secluded hiking trail, but if you’d rather not carry the weight or have to worry about disposal, there’s nothing like harnessing the pleasure potential of ole Sol.

Bearing a passing resemblance to an iPod or a garage door opener, the unobtrusive black or silver solar cell recharger that powers the matching, oblong buzzball has a tiny blue LED light to let the user know when it’s ready to rumble.

Vibration lovers with minimal sun exposure or a housebound status need not fear the dark, because this easily concealable stimulator can also draw energy from indoor light sources.

This little wonder is a Darklady Favorite!

– Exclusive review for–


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